Any guide map worthy of the name includes the ‘You are here’ signage. It normally helps me when I’m confused and relieves my stress in the street or complex environments, like hospitals.
We, dancers, need to find that signage too.
The first step is within, as David Whyte points out in the poem Start Close In.
Start close in
don’t take the second step
or the third.
…
To hear
another’s voice,
follow
your own voice,
wait until
that voice
becomes an
intimate private ear
that can
really listen
to another.
These words encapsulate, for me, the essence of relating.
“The temptation”, the poet remarks, “is to take the second or third step, not the first, to ignore the invitation into the center of our own body”,
For years, we’ve been using the term “embodiment” to refer to that simple and humble invitation to start any contact with a dive into our true nature.
Tools exist to help with this inside gaze, like our daily, sometimes minute-by-minute practice of tracking where the body is. It is a practice of way-finding body sensations, and locating places where feelings and emotions are felt.
It is almost a matter of orientation.
Pinpointing your location
Next time you go to a dance, look within and find the marker “You are here” before you step forward or gaze at your partner.
It’s a little check. Are you really there? And if not, where?
The film The Matrix has this wonderful image: before they “awake” anyone who is trapped in a constant feed of stories and mind constructs, it’s imperative to locate with precision where the body is.
Any meaningful map should include an invitation to take three deep breaths at the beginning of journeys.
And if we are extreme: self-regulation and presence-building checkins, should be added at security controls in airports.
Fully seeing into me -this embodied me- relieves stress and expands my capacity to see another.
Dance of Yes and No, Martin Eichinger
The sculpture Dance of Yes and No, by Martin Eichinger, is composed of two dancing figures. These sculptures change their meanings as their bases rotate. “The couple’s interaction shifts from surrender to defence, acceptance to denial, and commitment to abandonment”.
Last year, I had the chance to practice exactly this in a workshop about embodiment and intimacy. It was an exquisite dance experience. We were moving in and out of closeness making sure we didn’t lose ourselves in the relationship.
In a dance of yes, separation is needed at moments. In the distance, relationships can reset and recalibrate with presence.
Over time, I’ve been dancing my Yes in 5Rhythms flows and tango tandas, with friends in cafes, in walks with nature, when I cook, and when I make love. Over the last few weeks, I’ve been immensely fortunate to be dancing this gentle dance with my beloved.
Surrendering
Trapeze artists practice countless times, before attempting any serious drop or flying. Their life depends on it, but even with this constant thrive for training and hyper-focussing, they also experience surrendering.
That’s the point when we let go of all our well-crafted maps. In that sweet spot, the body already knows, and it is time to flow.
With good fortune, we will find ourselves in the sublime confluence of a Yes of two.
And that feels as good as finally arriving and letting mystery take over.
Stay attuned
Jesus Acosta
The sensational intelligence of the body
Philip Shepherd explains in this video what embodiment is, and why living in the present is so elusive.
An active letting go
The Dance of Yes, a demo
I’m glad this video is preserved on the Embodied Intimacy Facebook page. It’s a great demonstration of the Dance of Yes I mentioned in this post. Enjoy it!